Forbidden Fruit

I know it’s been quite some time since I have updated you guys on what’s going on. We had a little thing called football season get in the way of any writing that could have been done. And in case you guys don’t know, high school football is kind of a big deal in the state of Texas. At least to some people…


So let’s recap. We went 6-3 and got beat in the 2nd round of the playoffs by the #3 ranked team in 4A in the state of Texas. My beloved Hogs had a decent year and went to a bowl. At which, someone in Arkansas with deep pockets paid the kicker from ECU a LOT of money to miss 2 field goals inside of a minute in regulation and one in OT. He had to have been bought b/c even the kicker from the Cowboys could have made one of three. I heard they made him ride back to NC in the luggage compartment. Well they were going to but he missed the plane.

The holidays were good. We had a nice break and it was pretty relaxing. We stayed around here and knocked all three Christmases out in 1 day. It made Christmas day pretty hectic but we got it over with and were able to relax and enjoy the rest of our time off.

School is going fine. I don’t have any outlandish stories about our brilliant leaders of tomorrow to tell right now…well there was this one day we were on the track with our first period class. You see, our district has made a push to increase the intensity of our physical education department. So when the weather is nice, we go outside and do some cardio work on the track. Well this particular day, we had the students walk around the curves and run the straight ways on the track. The kids were doing a good enough job. Most of them have never run 10 yards much less 100! But this one particular girl, Taylor, had stopped running all together and was walking around the entire track. When she got around to the finish line where 2 other coaches and I were standing, I told her she needed to pick it up and run like the rest of the class. She looked at me, grabbed her boobs, and yelled, “MAN, MY TITTIES ARE HURTIN!!” One of our veteran coaches looked at her and calmly told her to hold ‘em when she runs, one of our younger coaches turned red and dropped his jaw b/c he couldn’t believe she just said that. I dropped to my knee because I could not stand up straight from laughing so hard. She walked the rest of the way.

So with continued exposure to high level excellence everyday, I felt it necessary for Corey and I to start a nightly bible story with our kids in hopes of raising them to fear God, love others and to know you don’t yell at a coach and inform him that certain parts of your body are HURTIN…MAN! We are going through a book called “Step into the Bible” by Ruth Graham. One of the stories is about the fruits of the Spirit. For those who don’t know, or need some reminding, they are: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control. At the end of each story, there are a handful of questions to follow up the story. Drew (6 yr old) is usually the first one to answer them and he usually blurts out the answers but is usually always right. I guess that’s the male coming out in him; you know, wanting everyone to know that he knows the answers! The first question on this particular story is, oddly enough, “What are the fruits of the Spirit?” Well Drew threw his hand up and starts saying, “Ew-Ew-Ew I know, I know.” (As is his nightly custom when any question is asked) Baylie usually just sits there and lets him answer or waits on me to call on her. Casey NEVER wants to answer and if I ask her to she looks at me and says, “Uhhhh Jesus”. That is her standard answer. To every question. Every night. And when I tell her that’s not right, she responds with, “Uhhhh God”. So this particular night, I called on Casey and she said, “Uhhhh Jesus”. I just moved on to Baylie. Baylie knew most of them, but when she got stuck, Drew raised his hand and said, “Ew-Ew-Ew I know, I know”. So I said, “Ok, Drew what are the other fruits of the Spirit.” He put his finger on his chin and as serious as he could be he said, “Well there’s Pineapple....” We couldn’t finish we were laughing so hard. I just put the book down and moved on. Well, we told our babysitter that story (she was with them when they were in daycare). Come to find out, they had the fruits of the Spirit written on cutouts of fruits and hung on the wall at the daycare. One of them was on the shape of…you guessed it, a pineapple. So those pictures of fruit were engrained in his head that they were the fruits of the Spirit. What a relief to know he’s not completely retarded!